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Watercolour artist and amateur rocket scientist Saki Pentona – “The art world is too parochial, too focused on earth”

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“The art world is too parochial, too focused on the earth. I intend to be the first artist to exhibit on Mars. My work currently consists of my plans, designs and blueprints for space rockets, Mars houses and associated necessaries. Living on Mars will be a huge step forward for mankind, and my work will be at the forefront of the push to live on other planets. This will be a struggle, it will make Fitzcarraldo’s endeavours look like a stroll round Hyde Park, but I will be there, the first coloniser of Mars.”

Saki is currently designing the flag for his colony on Mars, and finalising the design of the space rocket which should launch from the top of Mount Snowdon in late 2025. Collectors who would like copies of his designs (signing an agreement not to use them to build their own space rocket) are welcome to purchase – proceeds will help finance the first Earth2Mars Rocket and colony.

Anyone interested in going to Mars with Saki should get in touch. For the test flight to the moon you will need your own space suit and a packed lunch.

Pre-Pre-Raphaelites discovered by honeymooning hot air balloonist

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Whilst crossing Eel Pie Island by hot air balloon for his honeymoon, one of our art advisors Felix Chowder discovered an enclave of fine artists working in a style that could only be described as Pre-Pre-Raphaelites. 

“I immediately descended to a level beneath the clouds where I could, with my FarSight 5000 telescope, make out the canvases that these artists were painting. It was as if the art of the last hundred and more years was wiped away as I spotted masterpiece after masterpiece.

“I landed my balloon intending to purchase these marvels to sell at Pimlico Wilde. However the artists misread my intentions and, from the moment I touched terra firma did nothing save attempt to kill me. I escaped only through the quick thinking of my wife, who reignited the hot air balloon and flew away, with me dangling from a rope, attempting to avoid the sharpened paintbrushes being thrown at me.

“We are currently recuperating in Paris, but intend to return with a translator and purchase some of these pre-pre-Raphaelite paintings for the world to enjoy.”

Sad news from Oboe Ngua regarding the Binoto art project

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“Friends, I have sad news to convey regarding my fine art project ‘All the Bins in the World,’ which has often been referred to in the media as the Binoto Project (a portmanteau of bin and photo). I was too optimistic when I calculated how many photos I could take in a day. Rather than 200, I can realistically only photograph 20 bins per day. By my calculations, at that rate it would take until I am 97 to photograph even all the bins in Europe.

“I know this is sad news for all those Collectors around the world who were hoping to buy one of my photos of their local bin. To them I apologise and say this. If you really want me to take a picture of your bin then get in touch. You have been wonderfully supportive and I want to help you out with a binoto.

“Otherwise, although the scope of the project is narrower than planned, I will be continuing snapping photos of bins in England. Next week I will be in Bath, if you see me do say hi.”

Pimlico Wilde are pleased to announce the first London show of art world superstar Hannah Gralle

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Next year we will be showing Hannah’s series of work entitled ‘Citizen Kane versus The Vegetables‘ in which she has recreated almost every scene in Orson Welles’ great classic film using only vegetables, stock cubes and bottles of MacUmbrage single malt. Via stop motion the vegetables bear an uncanny similarity to the original film, yet they have an added poignancy as at the end of the film they are all eaten in a scene reminiscent of Babette’s Feast.

Collectors are able to buy the vegetables that remain uneaten, as well as stills from the film, which is odds on favourite to win an Oscar in the new category animated versions of classic films using vegetables.

Meet the artist – Back of the Ed

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“For too long portraiture has focused on the front of the body,” explains Ed Woolverton, who works under the name Back of the Ed. “The whole back of the body rarely gets a look in. Look at all the portraits in the National Portrait Gallery. Almost all are of the front of the model. This is a terrible frontal supremacy that needs to be stopped in its tracks. I have developed the Backal perspective, trying to bring to backs and backs of heads the attention that has been stolen from them.”

Ed lives in a disused shop on Oxford Street, where he has plenty of chances to sketch the backs of shoppers walking past.

”None of us have any real idea what our back looks like. We put so much energy into preparing our faces for going out, but next to no time on our backs. The back is the only place where personality spills out unplanned and with a real integrity that is missing from conventional portraits.”

Ed is open to commissions if you would like the back of your head, or the back of the head of someone else created for you.