The Bond Street Art Collective is a highly secretive group of artists who are involved in politics and the arts. Named, it is believed (for nothing about the BSAC is definitive) after the famous Bond Street in London, the group has thrived since its inception in the Eighteenth century, with members’ artworks – sometimes signed Bond Street, no matter who created them – selling for mammoth prices, whilst members themselves have reached high positions in government and the arts around the world.
Famous members are thought to have included Horatio Tappers, nineteenth century painter of Thirteen Studies of Queen Victoria in the Nude, (which led to his execution and his name being expunged from all art historical books and documents – in his time he was more famous than Rafaello) and Lord Spooner Spielgart, famous for gambling £10 million (a lot of money in 1787) on whether or not a snail called Timothy would win the club’s annual Three Inch Sprint.
The club is rumoured to have special coded eyelid blink patterns, which allows members to recognise each other and undertake rudimentary conversations in absolute silence.
No one knows who is currently a member, for one rule of membership has been leaked and is believed to be as follows.
- If any member should speak in public about their membership of said society, they shall be deemed immediately, from that moment on, to have resigned their position and be cast astray, never again to enter the Bond Street Art Collective Club House, receive any further benefits nor contribute to any Club exhibitions or other events, forfeiting all rights to become prime minister or president in any countries where the BSAC has influence over such matters.
Often abbreviated to BSAC, the Bond Street Art Collective is believed to have been behind the Great Exhibition of 1851, the creation of the Suez Canal and the building of St Paul’s Cathedral. In the arts, it has never been denied that the BSAC created the Impressionists and the Fauves. They also were a major cause of Dadaism.
Pimlico Wilde can neither confirm nor deny that they know any of the members of the group. However, some Bond Street Art Collective artworks are for sale through the gallery. These are signed by the group and delivered to PW in the dead of night, in absolute secrecy, whilst wearing balaclavas, after a celebratory club dinner of champagne and dodo sandwiches.